Consumerism
I love to buy. I love material goods. I love having stuff.
Those might be the only constants in my life. I've always wanted things; and my parents always bought them for me. First Transformers and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, then Magic: The Gathering (multiple times) and Star Wars CCG and Pokemon TCG, then import CDs—that list is so woefully incomplete.
I've always been a buying machine—and that fact scares me. I don't think any of you have any idea how often I think about what I want to buy or how easily I get distracted by potential purchases. I lost a few hours today just because I thought about bounce connected (TaQ's first album) again. I remember it was very hard to find (to buy), so I searched for ways to download it. In doing so, I found out about stromatolite (TaQ's second album), which is available for purchase (at YesAsia, no less). Off I went, browsing/searching through their selection and filling my virtual shopping cart. The total: ~$80.
$80 is fairly tame, yet still more money than I currently have saved from "allowance." Yes, I still get allowance, though not the way most kids do. Instead of handing me cash every month, my parents pay for me and I keep (accurate, I swear) records of my purchases. It helps me limit my spending. When I see that red, negative number in the current month's balance, I know it's time to stop buying. Yet, I still go on virtual shopping sprees; I still wrack my brain with purchase decisions (if I had only $xx, should I buy this or that?
).
It scares me. Am I setting myself up for disaster? I don't know; I'm still wondering whether to buy a bunch of CDs from YesAsia, a bunch of CDs from GameMusic.com, or Tales of Symphonia.